The Boba Fett Tavern

A backwater tale in a tavern about a certain famous hunter.

Written by Melinda McMahonUpdated • Estimated reading time: 4 minutes (851 words) • Resize Font

Hello there stranger, where'd you blow in from?

Not a talker, I can understand that. I've been a bartender for thirteen years, I know when a being doesn't want to talk. You look tired, those bags under your eyes are nearly down to your knees.

Hey I didn't mean any offence. I'll be hospitable, let me give you a drink and tell you a tale. I can see that's the reason you're here. Shuffle down in that cushioned stool and I'll begin.

Along time ago, way before we were around, there was a guy named Boba Fett. He was a bounty hunter, a real big shot. Top of the line, if you know what I mean. He was one bad ass. Took jobs that paid more credits than you could count in a lifetime.

Don't roll your eyes, I'm serious, this was one mean sucker. Cold, calculating and very intelligent. Not like your normal run of the mill bounty hunter. They broke the mould when they made this guy.

He wore the ancient armour of the Mandalorians, a civilisation that doesn't even exist now. But they were gentle in comparison to Fett. He was a walking arsenal, he had blasters, concussion grenades, a flamethrower and a rocket launcher strapped to his back. He was prepared for anything.

Well almost anything. You see my grandfather was one of his bounties, "merchandise" in bounty hunter jargon.

My grandfather, Yaylon Dontah was a bit of a gambler. One of his so-called friends, Callan, bet him twenty thousand credits that Boba Fett could catch him in a week if a bounty was posted on his head. Of course Yaylon agreed, twenty thousand credits was a lot of money those days.

So Callan called up Fett and offered him the job of hunting down his friend. Callan offered an amount that would never be paid off in his lifetime, but then he had no intention of paying the notorious bounty hunter. Of course Fett was only too happy to take on a bounty for ninety thousand credits.

Yaylon always considered himself a smart man, but then dumb people usually do. Anyway, he decided to hide himself on an isolated moon by the name of Endor.

Yeah, yeah that place was where the Empire lost out to the Rebels. Sure it's famous now, but then it was just another uncivilised moon.

So Yaylon was staked out on this little forest moon, twiddling his thumbs and trying to keep away from the furry natives. Four days pass without any indication that Boba Fett knows where he is. But then Yaylon gets this feeling that he's being watched. He gets really paranoid. Starts carrying a blaster pistol whenever he'd trek down to the waterhole.

On day five he's filling up his canteen with water and he hears a twig snap behind him. He turns and finds himself face to visor with the bounty hunter.

Yaylon goes for his blaster holstered at his hip, but Fett already has it in his hand. He'd palmed it while Yaylon had been scooping up the water. As you can guess Yaylon is starting to sweat. He has no idea whether Callan has demanded live capture or not. After all Fett was renowned for disintegrating his prey.

Fett merely points the pistol at him and then twitches it to the side indicating where he wants Yaylon to go.

By now Yaylon is beyond panic, he couldn't pay out twenty thousand credits. So he stands his ground and he says to the bounty hunter, "Callan hasn't got the credits to pay you."

Boba Fett tilts his head, his black visor was known to pierce a man's soul, Yaylon told me he quivered when Fett put the full force behind that stare. Yet Yaylon remained stationery. Perhaps Fett admired my grandfather's move, who knows, but he actually spoke. "He assured me he had the credits."

Yaylon started feeling a little more confident and says, "It's all a bet, the most he's got is twenty five thousand credits. I'll owe him twenty when you bring me in but I doubt that'll cover your fee."

Fett's hand lowered slightly as he considered the information. He then typed something into the keypad on the gauntlet secured around his forearm. Five minutes later and he walked away from Yaylon. He said not a word, just turned and left. Yaylon didn't even see his ship leave.

Once the week was up Yaylon returned home to seek out Callan to get his twenty thousand. The house was empty of life. His belongings were all in place and nothing appeared out of the ordinary. So Yaylon searched around a bit before he saw a note on the kitchen bench, it read:

Callan won't be returning. Your twenty thousand has been deposited into your account.
-- BF

Yaylon never saw Callan again, but he put that money to good use. It bought this very tavern and now you know how it got its name.

I see you've finished your lemonade. Want another? No. Okay, I'll see you next time. Bring a friend and I'll tell you another tale. Till then, goodbye.