Topic: Tell a joke

Here's a blonde joke too:

A dumb blonde is walking along, lost, and encounters a deep and wide river. She looks up and down the river for a way across but is unsuccessful in finding one. Yet, when looking to the other side again, she happened to see another blonde on the opposite river bank. She tried calling to her.
"How can I get to the other side of the river?" she shouts loudly.
The other blonde replied "What for? You are already on the other side of the river!"

idiots haha

ok I have only racist jokes...............I hope they are appropriate for this board.
BTW I DO NOT BELIEVE IN RACISM OR PREDJIDUCE I JUST HEARD THESE FROM FRIENDS!

What do you call a bus full of white poeple?

A: a Twinkie

What did the Mexican give you for your birthday?

A: Your bike back

hahaha

TW

Bradley FUNeral Homes
We put the FUN back in Funerals!

lols @ Si

I can't post any of my jokes here, they're all jokes that rip on stereotypes :D

Why are computers so fat?

They're full of chips and cookies.

Wow, thats good miba

I saw a funny sign in San Antonio one time:

Maggot's:
Fresh Meat and Produce

Lol.

Maggot meat in your cheeseburger!

:P

What happens when a vampire sees the sun?

He shouts from delight.

HAHA!

That is original!

Class, too! :P :D

What is a car without a car?
Nothing. :P

..........

Ummmmmm, that didn't make sense, The Fox. ;)

What kind of cookies do some gamers eat?

The kind made with Ninten-dough.

and i thought my jokes where bad.....

:D Thank you! I love bad jokes.

Blonde joke time!!!11one

A blonde walks into a store and tries to buy a TV. The salesman refuses, telling her that they don't sell TVs to blondes. Offended, she goes home and dyes her hair black, then comes back the next day and tries again. The salesman refuses again, telling her they don't sell TVs to blondes. The blonde goes out and buys a big hat to cover her hair, then comes back the next day and tries again. The salesman still refuses, telling her they don't sell TVs to blondes. In a move of desperation, the blonde shaves her head, puts on the hat, and goes back to the store to try and buy that TV. When the salesman once more refuses, she yells "Look, I dyed my hair, I'm wearing a big hat, AND I shaved my hair! How can you tell I'm a blonde, huh?!". The salesman replies "Well, first of all, that's not a TV. That's a microwave."

lol, its from the dark knight

a brain sucker jumps on a guys head and then it starts moving around crazily.
the guy asks "what is that thing doing?"
then another guy answers "it's starving."

Eh this is corny, but it's kinda funny:

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't work?

A stick

LMAO i laughed at that :)

Well here's a good one:

What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships.

still can't post jokes here... too immature/inappropriate.

Three men walk into a bar...

The fourth one ducked.

LOL :D You made me laugh, Sharra Fett!

Q: Why did the Stormtrooper start jumping up and down?
A: He'd stepped on ant hillies. (antilles...)

btw, on the bar and duck joke, it took me forever to figure that one out a few years ago when I first heard it. But when I did I thought it was hilarious. :D

Ah, screw it. Don't put me down as sexist or racist, because I'm not.

A blonde walks by with two black guys on both sides.

What do you tell her?

Nothing, you already told her twice.

Oh man...I was going to enter that, but you beat me :(

A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender "How much for a drink?" to which the bartender replies "For you, no charge"

nice joke

What do you call big bodies of water filled with grape juice?
The Grape Lakes.

If a blonde and a brunette fell out of a plane which one would hit the ground first?

The brunette because the blonde would have to stop and ask for directions :P

(I know way too many blonde jokes...)

That was great one Mel!

What you'd better have around de yard if you're going to let de children out?
Defense.

This one is pretty dark buuut...

I guy is waiting in a hospital for the Doctor to give him an update on his wife. His wife was in a serious car crash and sustained heavy damage.

The Doctor comes out of the operating room and looks at the waiting man.
The man asks the Doctor what the news is.

The Doctor says,"Well, this is going to be rough to hear. Your wife suffered sever trauma to her spinal cord and will be bound to a wheel chair for life. You will have to feed her and support her in the toilet and take care of here every need. She also broke both arms and will require 24 hour assistance. Also, she suffered slight brain damage and has a great deal of memory loss so she might not even recognize you."

The man stands there and starts to cry. He looks up at the Doctor and says, "are you serious?"

The Doctor says, " No, I'm just f...ing with you, she's dead."

I told you it was dark.

Haha yeah it was dark and funny though.

A man goes into an interview to join the NSA. After going through strenuous background checks and reviewing his considerable resume, the agent conducting the examination tells him that there's just one more test for him to complete. The agent hands the man a pistol.

"This is your final test of loyalty to the agency." The man says, "In the room over there, you will find your wife sitting in a chair. We want you to kill her."

Nodding solemnly, the man proceeds into the room and closes the door. Seconds later the agent hears several gunshots, screaming, smashing, and cursing. Soon after the man walks back out, speckled with blood and wiping sweat from his brow.

"What in the hell just happened?" The agent asked, bewildered.

"Well, you see, the gun you gave me was loaded with blanks, so I had to beat her to death with the chair."

LOL. That is great! This makes a play off of the different types of Imperial troopers.

What do you call a father whose been exposed to radiation? A Rad Dad