Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sylvester Stalone are in an opera house for another movie
Arnold says: You be Beethovan, I'll be Bach

I use to love that joke...

I'll abdicate at the drop of a hat
(BFFC Moderator)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

The Yautja wrote:

Hm. 
What's pink, red, and spinning really fast? 
A baby in a blender!  Ahahahaha!

Ahem.    Here's a better one.
Three men are taking their final test to become Third Echelon agents.  They are brought outside an enclosed room with on door.  "Alright," The teacher says, "For your final test, you must show your willingness to obey every and any order given to you."  He hands the first guy a gun.  "Your wife is tied to a chair in that room.  You have to go in there and shoot her."  The first guy shakes his head and says, "No, you're insane, I'd never do that."  And walks away.  The teacher give the second guy the gun and the same instructions.  He gulps, and goes in.  After a few minutes of silence, he comes back out.  "I can't do it.  I just can't.  He says, and leaves.  "Well, it's just you, I guess,"  Says the teacher, and hands the last guy the gun.  He nods solemly and goes in.  The teacher hears some arguing, than lots of yelling, smashing, crashing, banging and thumping.  Finally the last man comes out, his nose bleeding, and his clothes torn.  "What the hell?"  He asks.  "The gun had blanks in it, so I had to smash her head open with the chair."

Classic.

Neither of those are classic
The first one is just horrid
and the second one is just really really dumb...

Disciple Sift Through Lies; Few Grains Of Truth Be Known...

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

I've heard it as the husband tied to the chair, that makes a bit more sense I guess.
Anyway, I myself am a big fan of slapstick, or Abbott and Costello depending on how you look at it.
Groucho Marx's:
Ah Afirca Africa, land of the tom toms, the jungles. The first morning I was there I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I'll never know. Suddenly we came upon a swell pool, I raised my weapon. I shot. It was the eight ball in the side pocket.

I'll abdicate at the drop of a hat
(BFFC Moderator)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Well, then I guess you have no sense of humor.  You better watch your step, HB. There was no reason for you to insult my joke.  I didn't insult yours.  You really don't want to insult me.  Just ask True warrior, or Mandalorianspy9.

If ya love me . . .And ya know me . . . And ya've seen me . . .
I'm Old Gregggggggg!

30 (edited by Maltese Kentaiba Wednesday, May 31, 2006 1:49 pm)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Is it just new members that bug you? You haven't gotten on anyone else's case from the old board like you have MandolorianSpy and True Warrior.
Sorry to get off topic, I'll just stay in the back ground about it from now on. Reminds me of Belton for the moment.

I'll abdicate at the drop of a hat
(BFFC Moderator)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Here's one.

Q: What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup?
A: Anyone can roast beef!

Get it?
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Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

he,he,he......good one spidey. I like a little chuckle every now and then.


                                                                          {MW} TW

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Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

I like a few babies in a blender from time to time too. Mmmmm, fiber.

"I AM A SEXY SHOELESS GOD OF WAR!" - Belkar

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

SciFifreak90 wrote:

I like a few babies in a blender from time to time too. Mmmmm, fiber.

Why is that funny? I couldn't control myself from laughing.

I'll abdicate at the drop of a hat
(BFFC Moderator)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Maltese Kentaiba wrote:

Is it just new members that bug you? You haven't gotten on anyone else's case from the old board like you have MandolorianSpy and True Warrior.
Sorry to get off topic, I'll just stay in the back ground about it from now on. Reminds me of Belton for the moment.

No, it's just the annoying ones.  Which happen to be all the new ones.  The older ones usually are respectable.

If ya love me . . .And ya know me . . . And ya've seen me . . .
I'm Old Gregggggggg!

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

SciFifreak90 wrote:

I like a few babies in a blender from time to time too. Mmmmm, fiber.

That is so mean!!!

{MW}--[color=#FF0000]"Death and destruction to our enemies!"[/color]
"I wonder what the weather is like on Kamino right now?" Delta 62, Scorch.

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Mean, yes.  Funny?  Definately.  Nothing like dead baby jokes.

If ya love me . . .And ya know me . . . And ya've seen me . . .
I'm Old Gregggggggg!

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Well, for the sake of everyone else, let's try to keep these clean.

I'll abdicate at the drop of a hat
(BFFC Moderator)

39 (edited by Humorbot5 Wednesday, June 7, 2006 8:21 am)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

I'm not sorry for insulting your joke....

BECAUSE YOUR BANNED YOU CAN'T DO DIDDLEY SQUAT TO ME!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!


Maltese Kentaiba wrote:

I've heard it as the husband tied to the chair, that makes a bit more sense I guess.
Anyway, I myself am a big fan of slapstick, or Abbott and Costello depending on how you look at it.
Groucho Marx's:
Ah Afirca Africa, land of the tom toms, the jungles. The first morning I was there I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I'll never know. Suddenly we came upon a swell pool, I raised my weapon. I shot. It was the eight ball in the side pocket.

I like the Marx brothers too....
Except the two that left, but they were never very funny....

Chico, Groucho and Harpo were the true funnys...

Disciple Sift Through Lies; Few Grains Of Truth Be Known...

40 (edited by Maltese Kentaiba Thursday, June 1, 2006 3:52 pm)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Have you seen any of their movies?
I've only seen a Night at the Opera so far.

I'll abdicate at the drop of a hat
(BFFC Moderator)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

The Yautja wrote:

Mean, yes.  Funny?  Definately.  Nothing like dead baby jokes.

"No more dead babies. Dead babies can't take care off themselves. Dead babies can't take things off the shelve."-- Alice Cooper's "Dead Babies"

take it easy baby take it as it comes

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Maltese Kentaiba wrote:

Have you seen any of their movies?
I've only seen a Night at the Opera so far.

I've seen a couple, a little while ago

Disciple Sift Through Lies; Few Grains Of Truth Be Known...

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Here's a funny joke that I heard once--just so you know, it ain't true, it's just told in first person.

My sister and I were walking along this path, and we came upon this huge sinkhole. It was pretty big(we couldn't see the bottom), so we decided to toss a rock in and see how long it took to hit the bottom. After scrounging around a bit, we came upon a decent-sized rock and tossed it into the hole. We waited for a few minutes, and we couldn't hear it hit the bottom, so we're thinking, "Man, this is one deep sinkhole!" so we decided to roll in a boulder. After much grumbling, sweating, and various insults tossed back and forth, we managed to find and push a rather large boulder over the lip of the sinkhole. It quickly gained momentum and tumbled into the hole, and we began to wait... and wait... And wait... After several minutes went by, we were scratching our heads and thinking, "Oh boy, this is the deepest sinkhole EVER!" and being the geniuses that we are, decided to throw in a log. So we went in the woods and found a log and HEAVED it into the sinkhole. Just as the log disappeared into the hole, this goat comes flying out of the woods and jumps into the sinkhole. My sister and I kinda looked at each other, both of us thinking that that poor goat's elevator certainly did  not go to the top.
Well a bit later, my sister and I are hovered over the sinkhole, trying to hear if ANYTHING is hitting the bottom, when this guy walks up. After we traded hellos, he asked if we'd seen his goat. I kinda looked at my sister and said, "Oh yeah! We saw your goat. A few minutes ago he came running out of the woods and jumped into this sinkhole." The guy kinda looked at me and shook his head and says, "Oh no, that can't be my goat. My goat was chained to a log."

"Whoever is a highly evolved, super-genius raise your hand."  *raises hand*   "Oh."     
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Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Thats not my kinda joke.....

But its still funny......... smile

Disciple Sift Through Lies; Few Grains Of Truth Be Known...

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

RC-3222 wrote:

Here's a funny joke that I heard once--just so you know, it ain't true, it's just told in first person.

My sister and I were walking along this path, and we came upon this huge sinkhole. It was pretty big(we couldn't see the bottom), so we decided to toss a rock in and see how long it took to hit the bottom. After scrounging around a bit, we came upon a decent-sized rock and tossed it into the hole. We waited for a few minutes, and we couldn't hear it hit the bottom, so we're thinking, "Man, this is one deep sinkhole!" so we decided to roll in a boulder. After much grumbling, sweating, and various insults tossed back and forth, we managed to find and push a rather large boulder over the lip of the sinkhole. It quickly gained momentum and tumbled into the hole, and we began to wait... and wait... And wait... After several minutes went by, we were scratching our heads and thinking, "Oh boy, this is the deepest sinkhole EVER!" and being the geniuses that we are, decided to throw in a log. So we went in the woods and found a log and HEAVED it into the sinkhole. Just as the log disappeared into the hole, this goat comes flying out of the woods and jumps into the sinkhole. My sister and I kinda looked at each other, both of us thinking that that poor goat's elevator certainly did  not go to the top.
Well a bit later, my sister and I are hovered over the sinkhole, trying to hear if ANYTHING is hitting the bottom, when this guy walks up. After we traded hellos, he asked if we'd seen his goat. I kinda looked at my sister and said, "Oh yeah! We saw your goat. A few minutes ago he came running out of the woods and jumped into this sinkhole." The guy kinda looked at me and shook his head and says, "Oh no, that can't be my goat. My goat was chained to a log."

Thats funny!!

{MW}--[color=#FF0000]"Death and destruction to our enemies!"[/color]
"I wonder what the weather is like on Kamino right now?" Delta 62, Scorch.

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

I dont get it. WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH THE SINKHOLE? hmm



                                                                                                 {MW} TW

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Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

They tossed a log inside, and then a goat runs up and dives in. The goat was attached to the log they threw in.

I'll abdicate at the drop of a hat
(BFFC Moderator)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

*sniff* That poor log....

Disciple Sift Through Lies; Few Grains Of Truth Be Known...

49 (edited by Boba Dude Wednesday, June 7, 2006 2:02 pm)

Re: the "funniest joke in the world"

Humorbot5 wrote:

I'm not sorry for insulting your joke....

BECAUSE YOUR BANNED YOU CAN'T DO DIDDLEY SQUAT TO ME!!!!!!!!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!


Maltese Kentaiba wrote:

I've heard it as the husband tied to the chair, that makes a bit more sense I guess.
Anyway, I myself am a big fan of slapstick, or Abbott and Costello depending on how you look at it.
Groucho Marx's:
Ah Afirca Africa, land of the tom toms, the jungles. The first morning I was there I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I'll never know. Suddenly we came upon a swell pool, I raised my weapon. I shot. It was the eight ball in the side pocket.

I like the Marx brothers too....
Except the two that left, but they were never very funny....

Chico, Groucho and Harpo were the true funnys...

You just love having them gone don't you?
ME TOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

IAM BOUNTY HUNTER NOW
YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

{MW}--[color=#FF0000]"Death and destruction to our enemies!"[/color]
"I wonder what the weather is like on Kamino right now?" Delta 62, Scorch.