Topic: Closed door reopens
Closed door reopens... or tries to.
I want your attention for a minute. Won't be long (not VERY long compared to the whole towers I usually type, lol), and won't mean much for most of you as you never knew much about me. I just tried something huge a minute ago, and, well, I need to share.
For my family and I, it's been complicated for quite a while. I don't even remember when it happened exactly, more or less 5 years ago. My family broke up. Over a stupid question of Xmas dinner we couldn't attend to because my 70 years old mom was tired and not feeling well. A big part of the family (including my brother David) then stopped talking to me and my kids, cold turkey.
Most of that part of my family had always been kind of toxic to me anyway, always criticizing me and my kids, like I was just a walking bag of flaws. So, well, I was OK with their desire to burn bridges. Except for my brother.
I have never had any conflict at all with him and I missed him terribly along the years. He's been steady to them, it's just like that. His wife and I don't get along very well, and he's not one to call and insist on people when things are bad. I guess. It's what I repeated myself along the years to keep a bit of my sanity about the fact that he was never calling. Myself, I avoided calling him because I didn't think his wife would let me have him on the phone.
Even now while I type this, I have a hard time keeping my eyes dry. Well, tonight (or rather very early this morning, lol) I made a move. I looked him up in Facebook and sent him a friend request, just saying "your sis, x".
I changed my looks alot along the years. Gained weight, lost some, got preggy, changed my hair color. I am not sure he will even know who I am from the Facebook picture. I am terrified that he will never reply, that he still has hard feelings towards me or something. I really hope not. He is the best cook in the whole world, heck I couldn't stand never having his spaghettis ever again! lol.
I been missing him terribly and I hope he did too. We used to have a very very tight connection together. Share books, movies, music, videogames... It's his fault if I am a tomboy, lol.
People, you think you could try and pray for me that he'll at least ask who this blond weirdo chick is? lol. I really, really hope he won't just delete the message without a second thought.
I had to share. (fist on heart, told you I was a tomboy) he matters to me. Whatever happens with this, I will let you know if you care.
Thanks for reading