Once earth was invaded by aliens, it lasted less then a second, upon landing the aliens saw the opening credits of Walker texas ranger and turned around to go home.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.
Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.
Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
There is no chin behind Chuck NorrisÃ¢Â€Â™ beard. There is only another fist.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isnÃ¢Â€Â™t lifting himself up, heÃ¢Â€Â™s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
Chuck NorrisÃ¢Â€Â™ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.
Chuck Norris doesnÃ¢Â€Â™t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.
Chuck Norris gave Mona Lisa that smile.
Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.
Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost
Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.
awesome jokes draco
[i]The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed[/i]
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